Women: “I Am the Mockingbird.”

I was told at a very young age that I had to learn to keep my mouth shut.  It is “more safe and less troublesome” when you learn to do so.  This advice surely never stuck, so I live in New York and struggle to get in front of people in order to rant and rave about social constructs.  I do so on crowded trains now while making loud, uncomfortable observations about life, “Do you think trash juice is a safe alternative to weekly manicures?”

It’s a valid point…

I’m learning how to deliver my message. I’m developing what that message is. In my opinion most people who have lots to say are struggling to do the same thing.  Sadly, I watch too many powerful people squandering that privelege.  Telling lies about women’s bodies, like #5 here, “Women Can’t Get Pregnant From Rape.” Sweet Baby Haysoos, save my espiritu.

I don’t claim to know everything, although my mother seems to think that I think that she thinks that I think I do…or something. Do you think Rick Santorum or Mitt Romney‘s mothers chastised them for their “big” egos?  I wonder if their mothers’ tones suggested disappointment and critical scrutiny. Apparently, Gingrich‘s mother never did.  Do you think he believes in unicorns and the tooth fairy too?

I’m a big fan of self-confidence. Well, when I can dig it out of that trunk in which I shut it up when I chose to become a comic. I watch daily as children who have no skills in things believe in themselves strongly and wholeheartedly, and boast about it.  ”I am really good at basketball.” Well then, how come you haven’t put the ball in the basket for over an hour, Newt? Doesn’t being really good at something mean you actually succeed at it?  I think, then, it is safe to say I am really good at being single.  I guess some cliches ring true.  ”If at first you don’t succeed, try try again.”

Some people deserve self-confidence. Some people literally help others and change the world that boastful egomaniacs claim to do on their own. This week, I connected with one woman who heads up an organization which does that every day for women around the country. Emily’s List President, Stephanie Schriock, tweeted at me thanking me for my work in Pennsylvania several years ago. I had graduated college and knocked doors for her current cause.  Talk about learning humility. The current situation in which more and more women are speaking out against preposterous claims like the ones mentioned in the above link is an inspiration and a necessity to keep our country sane and balanced.

Just not if legislation passes removing our reproductive rights. We have funny women fighting for them by holding microphones and laughing at idiocy. I’d like to believe I am one of them. I’m standing on top of that trunk now, methinks.

Follow @funnychristine on Twitter. It is the only place where stalking is welcomed. “Oh, thank heavens!  A place for me!”