Talking Vaginas

Dear Republican men of the Michigan House of Representatives,

There are ways for civilized adults to disagree.

Banning people you don’t agree with from talking is not civilized.

This is not just your problem, I know.  The House of Reps in Michigan is notorious for this childish practice — Republicans and Democrats alike.

But come on.

I mean, my two year old gets huffy when he doesn’t like what I’m telling him, crosses his arms and says, “I NOT TALK A YOU MORE, MOMMY!”

And in my head, this is what you guys are doing too.


And I imagine you all with pouty faces when the Democrats don’t want to do exactly what you want to do.


And while this imagery is sort of humorous, it gets unfunny really quickly when you think about the war on women…especially in Michigan.

Because the House didn’t like what the women might say, it’s been made into a “No Girls Allowed” club.

No Pro-Choice women were allowed to speak concerning the bill about governing women’s bodies and neither was Planned Parenthood.

And now?  Now?  You are telling two women they are banned “indefinitely” from speaking on the House floor.  EVEN THOUGH THEY ARE REPRESENTATIVES.

You are telling them they cannot serve their constituents.

And why?  Well because one said “vagina” and one talked out of turn after you repeatedly failed to acknowledge her because you knew you wouldn’t like what she had to say.

You told two women to sit down and shut up in a debate about women’s bodies.

Do you NOT see how ridiculous this is?

You turned MY STATE’S House of Representatives into a plywood club house with a hand-painted sign that says, “NO GIRLS ALLOWED”.

You kicked a girl out for saying a word YOU DON’T LIKE.

Guess what boys, “vagina” is a medical term.

Your mom has a vagina.

You probably came out of a vagina, and if you didn’t?  You got INTO her uterus by way of vagina.

You would not be here without a vagina.

Yet, you want to regulate the crap out of what women can and cannot (mostly cannot) do with their vaginas and what is inside them, but they are not allowed to have an opinion on the subject.

They are not allowed to talk about their vaginas.

What is next?  A ban on vaginas themselves?

When Rep. Lisa Brown referenced her vagina?  She was speaking for all of her female constituents’ vaginas.

When Rep. Barb Bryum tried to talk about her amendment banning vasectomies if it wasn’t medically necessary, you refused to let her speak because you didn’t want to have a fair bill.  You just wanted to gang up on the women.  And their vaginas.

But not talk about the vaginas.

Guys, do you see how ridiculous this is?

Of course you do. But you don’t care, that is the thing.

You know very well this is not fair or logical.  You want to be in control.

And see just how big of a vagina you can collectively be.

Wait, did I offend you?

Or d0 I do that when I work out of the home, let my husband do his own ironing, and wear a skirt that shows my knees?

Because guess what?

It’s 2012 not 1951.

These things are allowed.

Besides as someone with a vagina, I would like someone who also has a vagina to speak for my vagina.

So lift the speaking ban on Brown and Bryum and grow up.

You have made me embarrassed to be a Michigan resident and be associated with you.