On Rape: Lindy West, Don’t Speak For Me

Oh, Lindy West…you assumptive, condescending, bitter woman, trying to speak for me.  Stop.

Stop using words like “victim” and “trivializing” in your high-pitched “Oh-Em-Gee” voice. Granted, you’re upset about rape, and the social commentary that goes along with the harsh, stark reality that some men (and some women) cannot control their sexual urges, allow their inner treachery to surface and, in turn, physically harm others.… [Read more]

She Works Hard for Her Money

If you are like most Americans today, you’re like that girl someone sang about in the 80s, working hard for your money.  This may be true.  Though, after you make it, what happens to it depends on your choices.  Our country is awash in debt, struggling to find the money to (as my grandmother said) “rob Peter to pay Paul.”  Not surprisingly, the trickle-down idea applies right here.… [Read more]

Shadows of Intolerance

“You have no idea how loud that is,” a man abruptly stated to a a younger man man listening to music on the train yesterday.

The older speaker continued, standing tall in his neatly pressed suit and well-worn baseball cap, angrily sighing between statements. “You don’t know, do you?  You have no idea how loud and annoying that is.”  He didn’t stop his verbal attack, despite confused looks from innocent bystanders, “It’s really like bees..just buzzing in my ear.”  His tone was condescending and disgusted at best.… [Read more]

Here’s a Story of A Lovely Lady

Last night, I watched the Republican National Convention on PBS. Instead of listening to commentary by news organizations, I simply watched and listened. I went out of my way to absorb the message that was being conveyed to the American people. I know I am a difficult demographic to reach, being an educated, urban, single female trying to make it without giving excuses for how “hard things are for us gals.”  In listening to Ann Romney’s message to women, I know for sure that I am not the kind to whom she was speaking.… [Read more]

Akin to Rape

Google told me today, thankfully, that “genius and madness are akin.”

We are enthralled in the dramatics displayed by some shockingly misguided and delusional beliefs expressed by a man who’s mother may not have told him that elves are make-believe. It is a display of how “we,” as a nation, allow powerful men to assume they have the right to say what they want without challenge from the people.… [Read more]

Isolated, Alone, and Angry

I may have spent too much time outside the small town where I was raised. I may have traveled a bit too extensively and witnessed a few too many hardships, heroes, and unexpected acts of kindness from stranger to stranger.  I say this because, very recently, the thought crossed my mind that if I had never stumbled out and tripped about (physically, not on drugs, you loon) like I have in the world, I might be a completely different person.… [Read more]

America as Seen by a Germophobic Comedian

Last week, I had the great privilege of traveling to Las Vegas to network in the world of stand-up comedy, and also do a little myself.  Given that the business of being funny isn’t always so, I began the trip expecting to take a highly observant role.  From the beginning of my trip, this, thankfully, was the case.… [Read more]

Come On Kids, Piece America Together

Have you ever watched a group of children try and solve puzzles?

Some children dive right in, grab the pieces and start shoving and pushing them together.  They focus on three or four pieces, trying to find the right way to connect the elements as they go along. The problem to solve is in the forefront of the situation.… [Read more]

Just the Facts: People are Crazy

I wanted to get “just the facts” this morning in order to get a positive and cheery start to my day. With that in mind, I clicked my way towards Fox News. Stop your judgement, and give me a second to explain.

Our country has become so divided, and we prefer to inform ourselves about the things that directly interest us or with which we agree.… [Read more]

Of Thee I Sing

In less than the time it took for a waitress to take my order for eggs and deliver them promptly, I watched the news long enough to see four incidences of vicious, mind-boggling violence that ended in such things as murder, cannibalism, and the chopping off of limbs.  Call me crazy, but maybe the Mayans were right when they predicted the end of times.… [Read more]

Wanna Get Outta Here?

It’s Memorial Day weekend. You live in a city, sold your car because it’s useless in urban life, and prefer to utilize public transportation because it has become a way of life. You want to go to a beach, but you don’t want to spend hundreds of dollars on getting there. Instead, you decide to research cheap options of getting out of a concrete jungle to decompress.… [Read more]

Obama, Gay Marriage, Hey!

President Obama:  I have only five words from my inner gay man to respond to your comments on the gay marriage issue yesterday.

“Hey girl. Hey girl. Hey!”

As a proud ally and supporter of the LGBTQ community and its fight for equality, the impact of the discussion between ABC News  and the President hit close to home.… [Read more]

Mommies, March, and May Day Madness

During my daily hour-long commute to work on Tuesday, I had the chance to get stuck in traffic on a city bus while the May Day march was passing through Union Square.  I, along with a pair of mommies and their toddlers, marveled at the movement. I was happy to see democracy hard at work, but wondered where all those people had been since I hadn’t seen them hanging out in the square for the past few weeks.… [Read more]

One of These Things Does Not Belong — Group Mentality

Now, I know you loved Sesame Street just as much as I did. I still watch it to stay on the up and up with my letter learning. The tunes are quite catchy, aren’t they?  I really love the letter, “C.”  Cookie Monster, although people have tried to change him into what they want him to be, has stayed the same.… [Read more]

Try Try Again

I went on the road last week to tell some jokes in an all female comedy competition.  Well, the car was touching the road.  I was manipulating the car.  I could really use some lessons in manipulation though. It’s tough! … [Read more]

It’s a Grand Ole Flag

Unity, the proverbial bone of contention, and the reason I carried a jar with me on my impromptu visit to Saint Paul’s Chapel in Lower Manhattan yesterday (to catch the inevitable rush of drops from my eyeballs).  Some women who have better bodies than most of us, and a whole lot less shame, wrap themselves in it (no, not when they die, silly).… [Read more]

Women: “I Am the Mockingbird.”

I was told at a very young age that I had to learn to keep my mouth shut.  It is “more safe and less troublesome” when you learn to do so.  This advice surely never stuck, so I live in New York and struggle to get in front of people in order to rant and rave about social constructs. … [Read more]

Occupy, But Read Too

Stand up, lay down, hug

Work: it’s what we do to eat.  It’s where we meet most of the people we know when we first move to a new place.  It’s where we spend most of our hours awake, and sometimes sleep there when we’re tired and nod off behind the computer.  We are the one country that people from other nations think that, “lives to work.”

What happened to that?  … [Read more]

War on Sex, Drugs: A Bunch o’ Malarkey

So Limbaugh called a female law student, Sandra Fluke, a prostitute.  Yes, and Bill Maher said “see you next Tuesday.”  I’ve been called worse, but that guy was on stage in front of a room full of drunk comics.  I was angry.  I was upset.  I wish I had been able to make an example of the situation like Ms.… [Read more]

Snooki Spawn vs. Santorum

I WILL NOT SHUT UP!

Maybe it’s because of Snooki’s baby.  Maybe I’m concerned, because if Rick Santorum got his way, if she’s RH negative and the baby isn’t we could lose her, it, or both. Whether you hate her or pity her, at least she’s a talking point during dinner parties or while you’re playing corn-hole in the back yard.  … [Read more]