Ask Mrs. Vera: Do you find last week’s election results encouraging?

Mrs. Vera with Doll House

Dear Mrs. Vera,

Do you find last week’s election results encouraging?

Yours not convinced truly,
Ken…Cloacanellie?
Canolismelly?
Cootchycootchycoo-new-hell-pee?

Dear Mr. Cucinelli,

Not knowing the spelling of one’s last name can lead to some confusion at the ballot box and that may have been a factor in your defeat you could have anticipated, but it’s too late, now.… [Read more]

Ask Mrs. Vera: Do filibusters actually accomplish anything positive?

Vera, with Henson magnets

Dear Mrs. Vera,

So, do filibusters actually accomplish anything positive?

Truly Yours,
Philip Ulcer

Dear Mr. Cruz,

On behalf of my readers, I must thank you for writing in, even if under a nom-de-plume (that’s Quebecois for faker) and calling attention to this most pressing of issues.  Being subjected to a filibuster-a-thon™ from a stubborn foreigner Texan truly feels like attending a function where everyone is depressed because the host is insisting on playing a party game involving running your head through a letterpress or embossing machine, with the most points going to the person who sustains the least brain damage.  … [Read more]

Ask Mrs. Vera: If Obama says he wants to invade Syria, will the GOP be against it, just because?

Vera with rabbit nose

Dear Mrs. Vera,

I am havink many bells, I even haff one that vhen you ring it, it causink countries to divide themselves bitterly along religiousky lines and gatherink up eye-pokink sticks, yes?  If I can find it again, wherever it has gotten off to, should I send it to President Obama? If he rings it while asking “Who vants to invadink Syria with me, da?” will world peace break out as Republicans prepare to do anything and everything to stop his Socialist plot to try and save some Syrian lives no matter how many Syrians might actually not be helped or killed in the process?  … [Read more]

Ask Mrs. Vera: Is there any way to stop Karl Rove?

Vera with blue pineapples and octopus

Dear Mrs. Vera,

Is there any way to stop Karl Rove from making-up stuff?

Regards,
Andrea “Tokyo Rose” Breitbart

Dear Endora Bombay,

Thank you for your inquiry into the chicken-egg philosophical mystery of cracked Super-Liars. I normally write this column while waiting for hours in the wind and rain for a series of busses that take me away from my house then eventually back to it so, often, this column can be quite wordy, but thanks to your question and the 22-Fillmore being less than a block away, I’m going to wrap up early and just go with “no”.[Read more]

Ted Cruz: Seeing Red

Doorle_351_Ted_Cruz_Is_Seeing_Red

So, just who is this Tea Party-approved Senator Ted Cruz (R-Texas), anyhow? When we first saw his picture, we thought we were looking at Joe McCarthy.… [Read more]

Voodoo Doll #41: Phyllis Schlafly.

Drawing of the notorious anti-feminist, Phyllis Schlafly, as a voodoo doll.

Until we read Brian Tashman’s recent article at Right Wing Watch about Phyllis Schlafly’s latest outrage — a condemnation of Defense Secretary Leon Panetta over his recent ruling which will permit women in combat – we weren’t even certain that this overblown, walking contradiction is still alive!… [Read more]

Praying for the Death of the President

Mike O'Neal, the Speaker of the Kansas House of Representatives, is praying for the death of The President.

To threaten the life of The President of the United States is a federal offense. To do so would be considered treasonous only in extreme cases but, at the very least, it’s a Class D Felony. And Michael O’Neal — the current Speaker of the Kansas State House of Representatives — has threatened President Obama’s life – not in deed but in word.… [Read more]

Charlie Crist — Democrat?

Charlie Crist — Democrat?

On December 7th, 2012, formerly known as A Day of Infamy, former Republican Governor of the State of Florida, Charlie Crist, became a member of the Democratic Party. Celebrations were held. Cheers were heard. Republicans who once embraced him are now blogging bitterly.

But is Charlie Crist really a Democrat, or did he change parties simply to oppose incumbent Florida Governor Rick Scott in 2014?… [Read more]

I’m Not a Scientist, Man!

Marco Rubio is not a scientist, man!

The 2012 presidential election is barely over and Republicans, still in the process of licking their wounds, are casting about for a viable candidate to run in 2016. And, according to rumor, at the top of the list is the Freshman U.S. Senator from Florida, Marco Rubio.

…and Marco Rubio is a member of the Senate Subcommittee on Science and Space!… [Read more]

Final bit of Schadenfreude: Am I Blue?

Am I Blue?

John Boehner is no longer orange but is now oh, so blue. As you probably know, Mr. Boehner is the Speaker of the United States House of Representatives, and the legislative body he leads is the only one empowered by The Constitution to initiate bills to raise revenue. Mr. Boehner is blue because his fervent hope that President Obama would have been defeated in his bid for a second term has been dashed.… [Read more]

Even More Schadenfreude: Karl Rove Going Down for the Third Time

Karl Rove is Still Rich, but He's Going Down for the Third Time.

Political strategists come and go like football coaches, sliding into obscurity when their team loses, but this guy? Karl Rove? He’s been doing this since the 1970s! In all that time, he’s invented more dirty tricks than Nixon! Hell — he practically coined the phrase, “that’s our story and we’re sticking to it.”… [Read more]

Taking the Low Road

Taking the Low Road — A Feel Good Cartoon.

As an ultra sensitive artist, I take things personally. In the natural course of events, I am sometimes able to purge my anger, and sometimes not. And lately, I’ve had to absorb a lot of crap from the news, and sometimes from people who used to be my friends.… [Read more]

Ann Coulter’s Legacy

Ann Coulter's Legacy.

We are tempted to say that Ann Coulter‘s legacy is her unflinching support of bigotry.

After Ms. Coulter tweeted that President Obama is a “retard,” Barbara decided to draw a Coulter cartoon and asked our facebook friends for a suggestion. One of them, to whom this Art-itorial is dedicated, replied, “You could draw a [steaming] pile of crap and put long blonde hair on it,” and the result is what you see above.… [Read more]

Avenue of the Plutocrats

Avenue of the Plutocrats.

In case you didn’t know, Plutocracy is a word coined in the seventeenth century to describe oligarchic rule by the wealthy and is a combination of the Greek words “ploutos” (πλοῦτος), meaning “wealth” and “kratos” (κράτος), meaning “domination”.… [Read more]

Tagg Romney — Bloodthirsty.

Tagg Romney — Bloodthirsty.

We’ve all read that Taggart Romney, whilst being interviewed on the radio, quipped that he’d like to take a swing at President Obama for claiming that his father, Mitt, lied when he, um, lied.

And we all know that Tagg will probably never get the chance, what with the Secret Service and all. But there is something he can do to throw a figurative punch — he could simply buy an electronic voting machine company and rig the vote in his father’s favor.… [Read more]

I’m Melting!

I'm Melting!

We’ve all heard that Mitt Romney pronounced at a closed fundraiser that he’s not interested in campaigning to the supposed 47% of Americans who don’t pay income tax and/or are to some extent dependent upon government.  Never mind that he was quoting the number for 2010. Of course, these families still pay taxes a-plenty, including state income tax and various local and sales taxes –generally the largest portion of their tax burden and among the most regressive of all taxes.… [Read more]

Prove You’re Not a Unicorn, Mitt.

Prove You're Not a Unicorn, Mitt.

We don’t know how it started, or why, but millions, if not gazillions, of people daily are using Google, Bing, Webcrawler, AltaVista and Ask to search for “Mitt Romney is a Unicorn.”… [Read more]

This Money Is For Me, Uh, I Meant Jesus!

This_Money_Is_For_Jesus

Ralph Reed?  Didn’t he slither permanently away through that crack at the bottom of the kitchen baseboard following the scandal when the original version of The Christian Coalition that he founded with Pat Robertson collapsed nearly bankrupt in 1997? Apparently not, as Reed was recently resurrected by a top-secret group of wealthy and powerful individuals to assist Wisconsin Governor Scott Walker fight the bid to recall him from office.… [Read more]

Keeping Us Safe From Gay Boy Scouts Since 1940

Doodle_298_Chuck_Norris_is_Keeping_Us_Safe_Since_1940

For most of us, Chuck Norris is Walker, Texas Ranger and a super-duper black belt in various forms of the martial arts, but he’s much, much more.… [Read more]

Just a Humble Coal Miner’s Granddaughter

Just a Humble Coal Miner's Daughter.

At the 2012 Republican National Convention in Tampa, Florida, Ann Romney mentioned that she’s the granddaughter of Welsh coal miner David Davies, and the daughter of Edward Roderick Davies. Grandpa brought daddy to this country when the latter was fifteen and, somehow, daddy became an industrialist and mayor of Bloomfield Hills, Michigan. Her grandfather was an avowed atheist and referred to religion as “hogwash” and “drudgery,” and there’s evidence to the effect that her father had no more use for religion than her grandfather did.… [Read more]