Dear Republican Friends

Dear Republican Friends:

We disagree on much. We have different philosophies on just about everything. However, for those who share my curiosity of people and desire to understand and know more, we enjoy these differences. We argue, debate and learn from each other. I enjoy these discussions and truly value opinions that differ from my own.

(I should clarify I am speaking only to my rational Republican friends. If you believe Obama is Kenyan, all Muslims are evil, George W. Bush was a good president or Glenn Beck raises some interesting points, I am NOT talking to you.)

I understand debate on how to fix the economy. I get that there are many different views on foreign policy and military intervention. Immigration is a complicated issue, as are the methods for providing aid while simultaneously motivating people to move away from welfare programs. No one wants people to be poor and suffering and we all recognize that we have to do something to improve both our nation’s schools and our health care delivery system. These are all complex issues. As our President has reminded us, if the answers were simple we would have solved them years ago.

But what I don’t understand is this huge movement across the country to amend state constitutions to ensure that same sex marriages are illegal. Banned. Adding language to limit people’s rights. North Carolina voted Tuesday to add language to it’s constitution not only banning same-sex marriages, but also same sex unions, becoming the 30th state to have some sort of discriminatory language added to its constitution. However, 6 states and the District of Columbia have voted with opposite results  and now allow the rights and privileges of marriage to all its citizens — leading the charge in this growing civil rights issue. We have one wave of progressively-led states moving toward acceptance and equality and another group clinging to….what? Tradition?

If you are going to tell me how damaging homosexual families are to society I’m going to need a few facts to accompany that hateful opinion. How is it that two people in a loving, committed relationship who want the same rights, privileges and recognition as heterosexual couples are a threat to our society? Our communities? Your marriage?

If you are going to talk a religious argument, I’m not going to walk down that road with you. Our constitution makes it very clear that there is to be no national religion and therefore your, or any other person’s, interpretation of religion should not play a role in the decision of the laws of this land.

The only logic I can see to this despicable trend is a last stand of people so fearful of change that they are desperately attempting to do whatever is humanly possible to put up road blocks at every point. But you can’t stop progress, no matter how hard you try.

Look. It’s going to happen. Just like interracial and interfaith marriage before- same sex marriage is coming. Our children’s children will not understand this argument at all. Gallup polling shows 53% of Americans already support it. 70% of those ages 18-34 support it.  On Wednesday, President Obama lent his voice to the growing chorus of those who desire equality for all Americans. We  are becoming more tolerant and more comfortable with  sexuality.  “Gay” and “Lesbian” are no longer scary words: it’s just who our neighbors, our siblings, our friends- or even ourselves- happen to be.

Eventually a lawsuit, just like Loving v. Virginia that came before, will land in front of our nation’s highest court and  it will all be over. And we will all shake our heads and wonder why it took so long.

You say you believe in the “sanctity” of marriage and here we have a group of people fighting for the right to be bound together in every way. Spiritually, contractually, legally. Why would you get in the way of that?

My advice? (not that you asked): If you don’t believe in gay marriage, don’t get gay married.


A Fan of Equality for All


  1. This is a wonderful article!

  2. First of all I would like to say excellent blog! I had a quick question in which I’d like to ask if you don’t mind. I was interested to know how you center yourself and clear your thoughts prior to writing. I have had difficulty clearing my mind in getting my ideas out. I truly do take pleasure in writing however it just seems like the first 10 to 15 minutes are lost just trying to figure out how to begin. Any ideas or hints? Thank you!

    • Courtney Eastone says

      10 to 15 minutes to center yourself? I think you are doing good!! It usually takes me a few rewrites before I get the flow of what I really want to say.

  3. Worth another “reread.” Like some should read the Bible againg “for the first time.”


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