The Romnesia Pandemic

The Romney campaign has shown us a super rich candidate who has said anything he felt might coax votes out of any given audience. The annoying question remains: Which Mitt will We the “You People” get if Romney is elected? Can we settle for luck of the G.O.P. draw? Therein lies the perils of a candidate who has stood for practically everything (or nothing) in his quest for political office.When’s the Mitt vs. Mitt-Last-Month debate? He could interrupt and lie to himself. Diagnosis: Romnesia.

I started to use a fortune cookie analogy, but Mitt wants us to forget how much personal wealth he has wrung out of sending our jobs to cheap labor, currency manipulating  China. Now he’s trying to convince us that he’ll now “get tough” on China. Mitt the reversible raincoat?

Romnesia does not just affect conservative politicians, it affects families. Now it helps if you have several mansions, a tax-deductible Dressage horsie, a closet full of lipstick red designer dresses, and “a couple of Cadillacs” for medicating gilded stay-at-home-mom spousal stress. Ann Romney is a willing, participating abettor of Romnesia; notice how low a profile ex-stogie lobbyist Janna Ryan, Esq. keeps? She could get a lucrative consulting gig with the Pentagon on next-generation “stealth technology” after hubby loses and gets to play “Mr. Mom.”

Romnesia seems to also be a hereditary affliction. Notice how scion Tagg Romney talked about taking a swing at President Obama? Generation X Romney faithfully carries the family torch of neo-Spartan tough-talking, but instead has to go be a missionary for his church when “little people” Americans get sent in harm’s way for an expensive decade of war.

In 2008, we learned of a rare condition where certain yeast infections led to hilariously chronic political brain damage, but that outbreak largely returned to Sarah Palin’s igloo Fox News studio in Alaska. This male columnist treads on thin ice opining on gynecology. Besides, conservative Republican men have decided to be the master know-it-all oracles about women’s health.

Madames et mademoiselles, remember the extremist statements of Todd Akin, Joe Walsh, and  Rick Santorum as Republicans who state their party’s anti-women’s health stances in ways one wonders how many times their wives have to tuck in their embarrassingly protruding magic undies? Why do you think that “pro-wrestling” maven and Republican Senate candidate Linda McMahon in Connecticut keeps running for the ropes when confronted with her party’s far-Right misogynist mantras?

Bottom Line: Mitt Romney has flip-flopped so many times I doubt anyone can frankly count on where he stands. Statistically, he tends to pander to Wall Street and the far-Right fringe. He called 47% of the nation “victims” and “dependent” on government, and he can’t run from that. To be Tricky Dick Nixonian about it, we have the tapes.

CEO Mitt has been consistent on something: Scarcity of specific details. Oh, and we’re still waiting on those secret tax returns.

He needs professional help dealing with the ravages of Romnesia, but just not on the government payroll. Fortunately, under Obamacare, President Obama reminded Mitt that he can’t get dropped from his health insurer for having a pre-existing condition.


  1. […] believe that the Romney family, what with all of its houses, cars, car elevators and, most of all, lots of the traditional […]