Daddy No Write Column Today. Shiloh Write Column.

by Shiloh Marie Schmalfeldt
German Shepherd, Age 6

Daddy too busy write column. Shiloh write column. Daddy watch football, do podcast. Daddy nice.

Why for people not nice?  Why for people mean to each other? Why need guns?  Guns scare Shiloh.  Guns scare Raven, too.  She my big sister, border collie, 8 years old. She pretend brave, but Shiloh know better.

Dogs no need gun. When dog mad at other dog, dog politics come into play. Dog know how to not anger other dog unless really trying.  Watch two dog sometime arguing over who had  ball.  (Shiloh had ball, but that not point.)

See? Shiloh HAD Ball. Raven Full of Poo Poo!

Dog no make direct eye contact. Raven make growl. More elegant, sophisticated German shepherd sit quietly and wait. Soon, silly border collie distracted by something, stop paying attention to ball. Shiloh pick up ball and walk away.  Problem solved.

Sometimes, when Daddy or Mommy throw ball meant for Shiloh, Raven (the big lug) gets in the way and intercept ball. Raven think she NFL cornerback or something. But we not fight. Raven growl. German shepherd (a superior dog in every respect) never growl unless good reason. Ball not good reason to growl. Besides, Shiloh get ball eventually because Shiloh tricky and clever.

Not to say dog never fight. But when we do, it over real fast. Nobody hurt. Just barking and yapping, maybe a nip on the butt. Who cares? Butt on Raven and Shiloh thickly furred. Then, it over, we check each other to make sure we both OK, we kiss, we go about other important dog stuff, like stealing Mom’s spot on the couch.

So, why not human, who think he better than everyone else, not able to solve problem without gun? When dog kill other dog, it usually because that was dog trained to do by bad man. Good man not train dog to do that. Good man teach dog how to do what dog does naturally, and that mean love.

Dog don’t care your color. Dog don’t care your politics. Dog don’t care your religion. Sexual orientation not important to dog. Raven is girl like Shiloh, but sometimes she try humpy humpy on Shiloh, but that just playing. It grosses out Mommy. That’s funny.

So remember, next time you pick up gun. Who superior being? Human who need gun to feel safe? Or dog who just need people to love?

Think about it.


  1. Barbara Broido says

    Ha Ha! I always knew dogs speak “Tonto”.

  2. Awwww! How adorable is that! Thanks Shiloh for the reminder that “DOG is LOVE”!!!

  3. Shiloh get book deal? Publisher eat ten lunches every day!